More Examples

These phrases have been collected over nearly a decade and come from many different places. Many of the puns have come from tabloid newspapers, as you might expect, but some of them have come perhaps surprising sources. Many of the broadsheet newspapers use puns in their headlines too (I remember one of my favourites 'tip-top taps' was in an article about bathroom furnishings in The Times!) and so do respected broadcasters like the BBC (from where 'surf and protect' came, teasing a story on beach lifeguards.)

I make that point about the source of some of this material, because there's still a feeling of snobbery about using lines such as these. So, not only have The Times and Newsnight employed phrases such as the ones that you'll find, but most us do in our day to day lives. Phrases such as 'kith and kin', 'dress to impress', 'silly Billy', 'as thick as a brick', 'bobbies on the beat', 'surf and turf', 'as drunk as a skunk' and so on are used in everyday speech. Now they, and other new phrases like them are collected together in one volume.

Many, many magazines have been scanned for phrases, and broadcasts watched and listened-to. Other turns of phrase I have come up with myself: I noticed that 'terrorism' sounds a bit like 'tourism', hence the entry 'terrorism hits tourism' on the threat to a country's holiday trade. Others are adapted from other headlines which aren't quite right: on Budget day one year I heard a newsreader refer to motorists and drinkers who would be hit by a rise in taxation. That's now become 'drivers and drinkers'. On another occasion I ached after walking a good distance, and thought the next day that my legs were hurting because they 'didn't recognise the exercise'. Another Line was born! An article on food talked about the popularity of root vegetables and said that they were 'getting with the beat' that's been re-worked as 'root veg are getting with the beet'.

Other phrases have come from company's own slogans (it's easy to preface a word in a story about McDonalds with a simple Mc: 'McDiet', 'McLibel' and so on.) Similarly, you can often adapt a catch-phrase linked with a certain celebrity with a story about them: 'a Brucie bonus', in a story about Mr Forsyth for example. Or adapt a well-known foreign phrase: 'France says oui to'... and so on.

Some of my personal favourites...

tv Stars In Their Eyes 'the great pretenders' / 'stars in disguise' / 'rock and roleplay'

Henry the Eighth - 'sex and chopping'

earthquake predictors: are 'fault-finders'

Some of the phrases turn up time and time again in various forms. For example there are various ones linked to the hit tv show Sex In The City (detectives: 'tecs in the city', sexism: 'sexism in the city', drunk: 'sex and the squiffy', confusion: 'vexed and the city', Christmas: 'sex and the Holy City', tv: 'sex and the Holby City', divorce: 'exes and the pity' and sofa: 'sex and the settee'! On a similar theme, Top Of the Pops has been variously altered to include references to police, babies, beer, vegetables, religion, rugby ... and fathers: 'Top of the cops', '...poppets', '...hops', '...crops', '...popes', '...props' ... and '...pops'!). These example show that when a phrase enters popular culture through, in this case a hit tv show, its title can be adapted by headline writers and still be instantly relatable.

A few entries appear twice in different categories. 'Shell shocked' appears under tortoise, and also for the fuel company! 'Really taking off' originally appeared in a story about Dr Who's Tardis, and that's what it's categorised as ... along with a description of the current popularity of impressionists.

Under some entries there is additional quirky information that you may use to come up with your own lines of thought. Football club references often list the name of the ground and their nickname (football - club - Aston Villa - Villa Park / The Villains) and the states of the United States list their nickname, country - US - Georgia (America) - The Peach State! This extra information gives you a chance to adapt the nickname for your own particular line.

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